Staying in an unhappy marriage could be the best thing you do, new study suggests
A loveless and unhappy marriage is the worst marriage ever. Just like communication is the very life of a healthy relationship, the lack of it means that the. Let's take a look at the reality of an unhappy marriage. Divorce isn't Just know that like many things, divorce has a beginning, middle and end. Know that Good psychological counseling can help keep you in a centered place. Finally, for. I've been writing a relationship advice column for several years and I get many letters every day, but I recently received one of the shortest.
How you think determines much of the outcome. By focusing on the problem, the problem grows, but when your mind shifts to the solution, anxiety and hopelessness decrease.
You start to have hope again. Instead of expecting your partner to fulfill your needs, find alternatives. Getting enough support is another aspect of growing your independence. Join a support meet-up group to increase your social circle. Feeling more connected makes you feel less alone.
Join a gym or start to go out with friends. Your spouse may even become more amiable. Stop fighting over what you cannot change and learn to focus on what you can.
In the long run, even if the marriage fails, creating a happier connection means that everyone wins. She shows others how to be more authentic in relationships by setting healthy boundaries and improving self-care. In her early twenties, she fell in love with the process of personal growth. She writes a blog called Relationship Rehab that offers helpful tools to create healthy and happy relationships.
Michelle also offers online classes on anger and codependency for additional support.
Signup for her FREE 5 day email course on anger. Or maybe it's a large enough component of your unhappiness that it clouds everything else -- good health and work you enjoy and hobbies you like and a support network you can count on.
Maybe your marriage is so unhappy you can't think about anything else. Maybe you feel stuck and just need someone to tell you how to get unstuck. How to get unstuck in an unhappy marriage in 10 steps: Talk to your spouse about your feelings, taking responsibility where you can and avoiding putting the blame entirely on him or her.
Express your needs clearly "I need more time with you. Express the seriousness of the issues and potential consequences if your needs aren't met.
Ask what your partner's needs are and what he or she has been feeling about your marriage. Consider a trial separation. In you are being abused in any way, follow these tips. Call in your support. Confide in trusted confidantes, like a best friend or a parent or sibling, and ask for whatever support you need to help get through this period, whether it's a temporary place to stay, babysitting help, temporary financial support, help finding a job, or just a shoulder to cry on.
Decide how much longer you're willing to be unhappy before you accept that it's time to MOA move on alreadyand then find a divorce attorney and start the process of ending your marriage. Remember that every relationship has ups and downs and that you are not alone in your feelings.
Remember that, if your marriage ends, you are not a failure. Remember that, even if you have children, your marriage is between you and your spouse and, if you can't be happy in it no matter how hard you try, it is better to be happy apart.
7 Signs of an Unhappy Marriage | employment-agency.info
And while you are following these steps, do everything you can to find happiness outside your marriage. If you don't have friends, make some. If you work in a job you don't likethink of ways you can make your work more enjoyable talk to your boss about taking on projects or tasks that might challenge you or teach you new skills or look for a different job. Find exercise you can enjoy on a regular basis dancing, biking, jogging, yoga, intramural sports, etc.
Take a vacation even if it's an overnight getaway somewhere with different scenery. Go to the water, walk in the sun, spend time with a child, practice healthy eating. Do one thing that scares you, then do another.
How to Survive in an Unhappy Marriage and Thrive
Learn a new skill, start a gratitude journal, pray, make your health physical and mental a priority by getting a full physical and talking to a therapist about your feelings.
Go to the highest elevation you can find -- a hill or a mountain or a tall building -- and look out as far as you can and remember that the world is full of people fighting their own battles every day and we all have struggles and you aren't alone in feeling unhappy -- everyone at some point has experienced sadness or feeling overwhelmed or lonely or like they're stuck and there's no way out.
And many, many people have overcome those feelings and their situations, and you can too. I know -- or I suspect, at least -- that things seem hopeless right now, but I promise there's hope. You can be happy, if not in your marriage then on your own. If you are fully financially dependent on your spouse and feel like you have to stay married because you don't know how to support yourself otherwise, you CAN do it.
You can fight for alimony that will help you as your start a new life. You can get an education and get trained in a skill that will help you find work that will support you and bring new meaning and fulfillment to your life.
This is not a hopeless cause. YOU are not a hopeless cause. You have the power to make changes in your life. You have the ability to get unstuck. The sooner you start unsticking yourself, the sooner you're feel free. This post was originally published on Wendy Atterberry's relationship advice blog, Dear Wendy. Follow Dear Wendy on Facebook. If you have a relationship question Wendy can help answer, email her at wendy dearwendy.
- How to Get Unstuck in an Unhappy Marriage in 10 Steps (Or: A Guide to Happiness)
- Staying in an unhappy marriage could be the best thing you do, new study suggests
- If you're in a bad marriage, don't try to mend it – end it